Dive into the archives.
- Movies that are better than the motion picture Dune
I hate the movie Dune. Here are some movies and other things better than it. Spy Kids one through four, From Justin to Kelly, You Got Served, Soccer Dog: The Movie, Kazaam, Gigli, Turbo: A Power Rangers Movie, Phat Girls, Baby Geniuses, American Ninja V, 3 Ninjas: High Noon at Mega Mountain, Son of the Mask, Glitter, Feel the Noise to name a few. Some things that are better than Dune that aren’t movies: Breaking a bone, getting kicked in the nuts, getting laid……..you catch that one? Of course it is dumb ass. Falling down three flights of stairs, getting stung by a wasp…….it’s worse because unlike bees they don’t die afterwards………thanks Tom for informing me of that. Walking in on your parents have sex, getting a paper cut, working in a nursing home. Thanks to my arch nemesis for suggesting this movie that wasted 4 hours of my life. Sting was in it and it didn’t even help. Toto did the music and didn’t help. I don’t think Johnny Depp or Brad Pitt could have helped. That’s all for now. West west yo.
- Huge shocker
I’m pissed off. Did you ever notice whenever there is a cleaning crew with some dudes in it they look like they just got out of prison. I’m sure they did with their teardrop tattoos and spiderwebs on their elbows. Greatest lyrics I’ve heard in a while are “Won’t you take me to Funkytown?” Where is funkytown? I want to go to just see what it’s like. I’m sure pimps and platform shoes. Watched Meet Joe Black tonight with my friend Bourbon. What a great movie. Never seen it but I love how Brad Pitt is so plain and honest and makes tons of awkward moments. Like after he has sex the chick tells him that it was like making love with a virgin and he says…….thank you. Hah how f’n random is that. I had a piece of paper with all this stuff I wanted to rage about but lost it. I’m watching highlights from pro and college basketball games. You know what I’m sick of seeing. People holding up their own jersey’s and when they yell (lip reading) Let’s go. Let’s go where bitch? Where are we going? I don’t get it. Still want my free Dr. Pepper Axl. Put the fucking album out for the love of the sweet tasting beverage. My hippie friend is quitting his job working with the retards. It’s good for them but damn I’ll miss the entertainment I get from it. Jose Canseco just shut up. We’re tired of hearing how you hate baseball because you cheated and now you narc out everyone or claim so and so did steroids or HGH. Hey another Viagra commercial……..fan-freaking-tastic. Really? Does anyone even know that the women’s NCAA Tournament is going on. I didn’t but just saw a highlight of some it. i nearly fell asleep. How many lesbians do you think are in college and pro basketball. I know that’s stereotyping but seriously. Hey Cubs fans. Be happy now before the Cubbies blow the season right after the All-Star break. It happens every year. I still don’t like hippies. I’m so old I pulled a muscle in my shoulder the other night taking off my jacket. Just saw a commercial for some porn on Dish on Demand. Thank you for the honesty. They say All hot girls and no plot. More later it’s lightning out and I need to turn off the computer. Put that in your pipe and smoke and west west yo.






